It is nearly Christmas, hoorah, and we all know what that means. Carol services, advent crowns, Jesus? No! It means the Coca-Cola advert with the lorries will be on TV. (Apologies to my mother - I know Christmas is all about Jesus really).
But this year, things are different. Coca-cola have planned a two-prong attack, and I seem to have missed the first prong (do I need to apologise to my mother again?). Apparently the 'Holidays are Coming' advert underpinned the 'anticipation phase' of Christmas, which ran from 14 November to 13 December. Now we are into the 'celebration phase'. But I am not ready to celebrate. I did not see any lorries on TV (though the contributors to this fascinating yahoo answers chain obviously did), and now all I have is this unpleasant offering:
I do not like the Coke Santa when he moves. He's got that dead behind the eyes, slightly evil Tom Hanks in Polar Express look about him, but he's not computer generated, he's an actual person. When he tilts the snow globe, about 21 and 38 seconds in, it is particularly disturbing. Tilting the snow globe sounds like a terrible euphemism. Sorry to my mother, again.
I'm sure it's lovely to drink Coke at Christmas so that you can feel a sense of togetherness that no other fizzy beverage can provide, but the thought of a creepy puppet master dressed up as Santa, manipulating the level of the land so that people can have a Christmas snog does not fill me with Christmas cheer. And the song is rubbish. Bah humbug. Ah, now I have found the true spirit of Christmas.
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